My 'friend' Stu

On Saturday night I went to the local club, which is by any ones standards a bit of a dive but as its the only one in town everyone goes there. This means that even though it's an overpriced, disgusting, hot, smelly excuse for a club there is usually a lot of people there that I know which can make it one of the best places for a night out, especially over the holidays when everyone is back from uni. This Saturday I was out with The Boss, his girlfriend and another friend and wasn't having the best night until I bumped into some guys that I went to school with. We were all quite close in school but have drifted over the years so that I hadn't spoken to any of them in at least a year, one of these guys was Stu and meeting him brought back some memories I have to share.

When we were in school Stu had a major crush on me, he was possibly even in love with me. This lasted for over two years and the whole time we were very close friends and spent a lot of time together. Many times over these years I kissed him and eventually we started going further, just after we left school I slept with him. It only happened on the one day although several times. Before this Stu had been a virgin (he was my second). I was never physically attracted to Stu and don't really know why I did what I did but it has got to be one of the most selfish things I have ever done. Instead of letting him move on with his life I kept stringing him along, all the while also getting with other guys including some of is friends.

He later fell for one of my friends and they were together for over two years, they have recently split up though and after Saturday night he has been texting me quite often and was trying to get me to go round to stay at his on Monday night. Obviously I told him no, I have a boyfriend and truth be told, even know when he is actually quite hot I'm still not in the slightest bit attracted to him. But I want to try and make up for how horrible I was to him in some way.

I am actually tempted to just delete this and not post it, because more than the cheating and the lying it makes me feel like such a bitch. But I will, because the point of this blog is to tell the truth about myself and to delete this now would be to lie.